By Sarah D. Park

One of the key Christian tenets that I learned while growing up was that the goal was to become like Jesus. 

Deny yourself and follow Christ. Deny what makes you you; your desires are suspect, they may even come from the devil; ask not what do you want but what does God want for you? Yet not my will but yours be done. 

It’s a strange notion to introduce to a young girl. Furthermore, I liked who I was – something not many little girls could say for themselves. How was I supposed to become like a 33-year-old man who lived thousands of years ago and lived a life that didn’t look anything like mine?

God bless my young soul, I sincerely tried. 

Then I encountered women who were fully realized. As in they lived life so deliberately. Erna Kim Hackett, Jenny Hall, and Tracey Gee are three friends who came together to put on a conference back in 2019 to invest in later-in-life women, which by our society’s standards meant 30 and over.  

These women are so different from each other, and if I close my eyes, they are ablaze in distinct and singular colors. Like they lived their life in Technicolor and I was struggling to make sense of my greyscale way of being. 

It was in how they had exercised courage to make choices that honored their desires — desires that they believed God had given them, desires that were meant to be listened to and cultivated rather than be suspicious of and suppressed. To me, they were vivid examples of what it meant to live as God made them and how beautiful it is to bear witness to that. 

I don’t know how these nuances could’ve been conveyed to a young girl. But I see that Jesus lived his life in Technicolor. He was unapologetic about his values and his desires and did not compromise in living them out. What a way to live.

Sarah D. Park is a freelance writer whose work focuses on the cultivation of cross-racial dialogue with a Christian faith orientation. She is also a story producer for Inheritance Magazine and manages communications for several organizations. She currently calls the Bay Area her home but is an Angeleno through and through.