Photo by Buwaneka Saranga

By Jerrica KF Ching

It may be cliché, but the mind is definitely a powerful thing.  I feel like I emphasize this for clients over and over in my work as a mental health therapist, but oftentimes I forget to take my own advice.  As Melanie Mar Chow pointed out in her writing for AAWOL last week, the word “mind” can be recognized in many different ways.  When I use the word “mind” with clients, I am typically speaking with clients about how their mind can perceive a situation as positive or negative.

I feel like it is safe to assume that most human beings would like to feel positive about their lives.  My job is based around helping clients heal from pain, trauma, and suffering, so that they can have more fulfilling lives.  Sometimes it is difficult to admit that the journey through that process can be bumpy, unexpected, and sometimes scary before it becomes appealing.

Looking back on when I was an intern in 2014, I felt like I was being an overly peppy, overly encouraging therapist-in-training.  When clients asked me, “What do I do?” my typical response would be, “Try to focus on the positive instead of the negative.”  I have learned throughout the years, however, that this type of encouragement can be interpreted as being dismissive.  Some clients would tell me, “But Jerrica, you just don’t understand.”  My well-intentioned but rather naïve hope to “fix” someone would often result in a response like “But you’ll be so much happier if you don’t think about when you’re sad!”

I have learned that sometimes, in order to help minds heal, I need to acknowledge the power of one’s mind, even if that means acknowledging the negative.  There are times when I don’t want to acknowledge the negative because of my own anxiety or fear that acknowledging something that is troubling will make that trouble even bigger.  I think to myself, If I bring this up, what happens if my client feels even more awful and gets more depressed?  But I must remember that my work as a therapist is not about how I am feeling about a client’s situation; my work as a therapist is about promoting healing and helping while walking alongside the client through the journey.

I know I am speaking specifically towards a client-therapist relationship but I do believe that many of those of you reading this in other helping professions such as pastoral counseling, support groups, or even in our friendships with others can echo similar sentiments.  It is much more helpful and beneficial to empathize and acknowledge the hurt or the pain than it is to pretend it is not there, or to ask someone not to look at it.

Our minds can be very powerful and can influence how we perceive a situation; however, the power of God’s grace, mercy and love is unfathomably greater.  Paul provides us with that friendly reminder, “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it” (1 Corinthians 10:13).  When I read this, it reminds me that even during negative circumstances, there is a reason and a plan behind it all.  The hardships are there for growth and continued learning, not to give us a difficult time and to fail.

May we all continue to go forth in fellowship and stewardship, recognizing how powerful our minds can be, but also how faithful God is to us.  May we also continue to spread that message to other people we encounter in our lives, and be examples of God’s grace by acknowledging the negative to help people work towards the positive.

Jerrica KF Ching lives in the beautiful state of Washington and works as a Mental Health Primary Care Provider serving children, adolescents, and their families at Columbia Wellness.  She graduated with an MA in Marriage, Couple, and Family Counseling from George Fox University and is working towards becoming a licensed marriage and family therapist. Her research on racial colorblindness has recently been published in The International Journal of Social Science Studies.