Photo by Haifeez

By Tina Teng-Henson

I’m back to my
One finger typing
Fragmented thought catching
Reflection writing
For you

This work is
The sweetest sabbatical
Known to man

But only given to women

Received

If you can
Ignore the dishes
Put up your feet
And simply be

Nurse on the left
Nurse on the right
Diaper change
Track it on the app
Take a short nap
Take in the face
Of your sleeping child

Will I ever work again?
What will I do, if I do?
When–
Oh right
Gotta call Vanguard
Pick up the other two
Make some major life decisions
And turn over the laundry

Somehow,
This way,
As a
Mostly at home
Mother of three (!)
There’s actually time
To disciple others
Pray for those in need and
Hear from God

My husband is the one
Leading a small group
Serving at church
Invited to do this
Asked to do that

And that’s fine with me!
I’m actually
Very content
About that

This fall we had
Time
Space
Heart
To host
Cook loving meals
Love family
Love friends

Do the work of the kingdom
By
Being the workmanship of the King

Maybe I’ll always ever be
A kingdom work
(Versus a church worker)

Full time

Yet unpaid

Except in
The love and trust
Of dear friends
Who bring us meals
And share their hearts

While we sustain
This precious 8 lb life

I heard today
Some very sad news
Of Christians behaving badly
Once again

And I was not surprised
(After all, our sinful nature is never a surprise)
But just so sad

That people can get so hurt
And others can react so fast
Without thought or prayer

I’ve been there before
This is all too common

Dignity and integrity
Performance and pedigree
Everything deep within a soul
Can get so mired up together,
Twisted, tangled, torn.

So I come again
To my true work
Because there’s nothing I can do
Sitting here nursing the baby
In a darkened room
I can’t tell you the details
I can’t reach out to the person
I can’t undo what’s been said or done

But I can pray…
Cuddle this sweet face
Intercede with all the love and care
I cannot show otherwise

I can lift up broken hearts
Pray for forgiveness
Hope for restoration
Hold tight to a young life
And believe on everyone’s behalf

For a miracle
A breakthrough
A turnaround moment.

Tina Teng-Henson has been blessed to learn + grow alongside so many different people, in so many places: Long Island, NY — Harvard College + the South End of Boston — Nairobi, Kenya and Lanzhou, China. Tina, her husband, and their three children live in northern California.