By Melanie Mar Chow

Photo by Ed Schipul

The only way that we can live, is if we grow. The only way that we can grow is if we change. The only way that we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we can become exposed is if we throw ourselves out into the open. Do it. Throw yourself. ― C. JoyBell C.

Many a time I’ve cheated myself from God’s best because I could not fathom change. But in my area of ministry, I’ve learned that unless I have the opportunity to learn and be stretched, I cannot grow. J. Robert Clinton talked about how leadership requires a learning posture. Good leaders are willing to learn and the above quote reminds us that the only way we can keep a learning posture is to expose ourselves to new things.

I think that is why I’m thankful for the existence of campus ministry. Many of my friends enjoy church ministry for the very reason that unless someone does something challenging — positive or negative — church can pretty much stay the same for a long time. Some leaders serve for a long time in the same role, doing the same thing. But when faced with change, a more liminal space is needed to encourage growth and change.

As a campus minister, change comes every year by nature of the movement of students who come to begin their studies or students who go due to graduation, failure, or transfers to other programs. As a little girl, my daughter who loved the attention of our college students soon came to the realization that the students she got attached to and bonded with were graduating, and when they told us “goodbye,” something struck her. She realized and asked a day later why we said “goodbye” – and mourned the possibility that we wouldn’t see these students for a while.

I’ve also seen the growth that happens in the 4-5 years a student is in college, from their child-like youth as incoming freshmen looking lost in new environments to their senior year, all dressed up and ready to take on the world. I can see it not only in the changes physically that happen from being a teenager to maturing into adulthood, but also in the changes academically and intellectually, life skills, and their understanding of personal responsibility as well as decision-making that affects others.

Something I often do is trust God to remind me of people He brings into my life and to follow them, to keep up by checking in with them and to continue praying for His best for them. I sometimes remind them this is a tough season, but like a book, it is a chapter of your life and though it may not be an awesome time now, it can be awesome because God knows the story’s end and God is good. We just have to wait to see and experience it. I know that even if there is a rough spot for a friend in their relationships or ifI don’t agree with a person, the commitment I’ve made to them is for life. People can choose to stay with me or move on, but I try to stay committed, even through some difficult challenges in our relationship.

Thanks to Facebook and facial recognition software, I’ve found a lot of the people I thought I’d never see again. I also found that in the process of keeping in touch, it is important to see that people continue to grow in their faith and relationship with God. It also helps me to measure growth in my life, because as I strive to keep in touch with significant people God brings into my life, it challenges me to pray for them in their needs, losses, failures and victories. To follow people and to entrust our lives in God’s hands, even in the unknown, is far better than staying in the same places. The lifetime goal of a Christ follower is the intention to grow. How? By processing deeper the truths He gives us in His word. Growth happens as we process through the changes in our life with the life-changing influence of Jesus. Even more blessed is for those of us who journey with Jesus to encourage others to grow.

Rev. Melanie Mar Chow serves God through Asian American Christian Fellowship, the campus ministry division of the Japanese Evangelical Missionary Society (JEMS). She has been an ordained American Baptist minister since 2004. A Pacific Northwest native, she currently lives with her husband and daughter in Southern California.