Photo by Michael Mueller

By Joy Wong

For the past few months since shelter-at-home orders have been in place, I’ve been viewing the time at home with the kids as an extended vacation; something to be endured, but only short-term. While my extroverted husband felt cooped up and struggled, I felt my extreme introversion helped quite a bit. I often didn’t mind being at home all day; sometimes, I even enjoyed it.

But these days, I’m starting to feel a bit of despair. This season which I once thought of merely as temporary seems never-ending. As if I temporarily held my breath and put my head under water for a bit, I’m now feeling more desperate to “come up for air”; and yet every time I look at the news, the cases of Covid are soaring and increasing, the hope of a vaccine seems distant and dubious, and the possibility that this season could be a while is slowly sinking in.

This month, the theme for our blog is “power,” and in regards to most everything on this topic, I’m struggling. The topic of “power” is thrown around on the news everyday — the abuse of the power of leaders, the power of the people to protest, etc. But in regards to Covid-19, I feel nothing of power — my own power, other’s power, or even God’s power. On the contrary, I feel completely powerLESS — my life restricted and imposed upon. Perhaps that’s one reason why so many people choose to defy health orders, as they feel it as such a weight, an imprisonment, almost.

Even Scriptures that describe God’s might and power provide little comfort. They seat God high and lofty above us, but too distant to be relevant, especially when the world around me seems chaotic and out-of-control. It’s easy to think, If God is powerful, then why are we going through this? Will God just let us be tossed and turned as we are right now?

Instead of looking to the image of God as King, high and mighty seated on a throne, I rather find comfort in the power described in Romans 15:13: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (NIV). These days, when the outlook on the pandemic is so bad, when places that were deemed free of Covid-19 are having outbreaks again, and when the best outcome still sets any sense of normalcy a long way off, it’s easy to fall into despair; it truly takes the power of God to hope.

My prayer for myself, and for us as the community of God, is that despite feeling tossed and turned amidst chaos, desperation, exhaustion, grief, despair, uncertainty and anxiety — that we would know the power of the Holy Spirit to hope. And not just bits of hope — but rather a hope that overflows!

Joy Wong has an MDiv from Fuller Theological Seminary, a BA in English from Princeton University, as well as four years’ experience in industrial distribution management.  She is a contributing author to Mirrored Reflections: Reframing Biblical Characters, published in September 2010.