Photo by David O’Hare

If there was ever a time that proved connection with other human beings to be crucial and vital to our mental health, we have been staring at it in the face for the past five months. For many of us, myself included, back in March when news of COVID-19 first came around, the idea that something invisible to the eye could cause statewide and later nationwide closures was unheard of.

The thought that a virus could cause this much loss and this much uncertainty in a short amount of time was unthinkable. For many of us, our lives have changed drastically and dramatically overnight. What is “normal” now? What will be our new daily routine? What is our routine for returning to work? What will it look like for youth returning to school? It is an endless whirlpool of the world’s anxiety, with some bits pulling us stronger than others. As a mental health therapist I have seen more people request services than ever before, and the majority of the cases being related to the question, how do I cope with something completely out of my control?

A way of coping is often through communicating our thoughts and feelings with others around us. Many of us feel safe to confide in our friends, coworkers, church members, and family. So how do we navigate this while still respecting various statewide mandates? How do we stay connected, while also not becoming consumed with the huge amount of collective anxiety during this time? Technology has been incredibly helpful to allow many of us to do our jobs, for students to continue to learn, and for us to maintain connections with others near and far. Sometimes however, technology also becomes the reminder that 2020 has become anything but ordinary. There are times during a Zoom call with friends that I am reminded of how far away I am from others. It also reminds me that at one point in time I could easily hop on a plane and visit people thousands of miles away, all in the span of less than a working day. There were many times in the past where I had hoped there could be some way that I could work from home; however now that it’s a reality, I struggle to find ways of having clear boundaries between my work and home life. I know that I am not alone in these sentiments, and that many of my AAWOL sisters have also reflected on feeling out of control during this pandemic.

Sometimes when I feel as though I am drawing closer to the endless whirlpool of anxiety, I can ground myself in knowing that I am not the only one feeling this way. Although my ability to connect with others looks different, it only further strengthens my appreciation for these connections. While the format of how my life is structured has changed, I am filled with gratitude that I have an option to maintain my job. My connection to others and my connection to normalcy may have changed, but not severed. I believe we are all beginning to walk towards acceptance, that we are truly in a time where it is completely okay to not be okay.

I find peace in knowing that God has forged many long-lasting relationships for me before any murmuring of COVID-19 began. I find comfort in knowing that God has been able to provide shelter, food, and connection –- the essentials for survival –- during a time when what we knew yesterday is not the same as what we know today. May thoughts of peace, gratitude, and acceptance reach all of you as well.

Jerrica KF Ching grew up on the island of Oahu, Hawaii and currently lives in the beautiful state of Washington, working as a licensed mental health counselor and Asian/Pacific Islander mental health specialist at Columbia Wellness. She graduated with an MA in Marriage, Couple, and Family Counseling from George Fox University, where she is now an adjunct professor and supervisor. She finds joy in sharing her compassion with students on the importance of recognizing and acknowledging racial and cultural differences in others. Her research on racial colorblindness has been published in The International Journal of Social Science Studies.