Photo by Alex Bellink

By Melanie Mar Chow

When is the last time you had a good belly laugh with others? The themes for the AAWOL blog this year comes from John O’Donohue in his book, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom. “Anam cara” can be loosely translated as “soul friend” and yes, we all need a friend, especially for our souls.

As the season changes to fall, I find I lose the ease of summer as the work of another school year begins. It is back to a routine. Traffic has increased and the ability to take life less seriously is a challenge as deadlines and year-end concerns loom. It is a time to make sure the goals of the year are fulfilled and to trust that what God began at the beginning gets fulfilled and completed by December 31. Yet, spontaneity, including laughter, can help bring meaning to all this pressure.

How wonderful to find I am the first blogger to bring thoughts on spontaneity! But I am not a spontaneous person so I had to delve into the book a little deeper. O’Donohue’s wisdom is only a few short pages. He notes that “to be spontaneous is to escape the cage of the ego by trusting that which is beyond the self.”

His writing on spontaneity addresses the day-in and day-out of work. He notes if there is deliberate, forced ways, nothing new can happen and notes that if you force the soul, you will never succeed. His example is that if you have problems with sleep — too much work with no rest– if you move away from the demands of work and simply rest, the ability to sleep returns.

He reminds us that our work “should be expressive of your identity, dignity and giftedness – if you sell your soul you will live a life of misery.” When I think of misery, I think of sadness and often loneliness. How strange then, when one works in an office, does one find that too much focus on work or tasks then robs us of community.

And then it struck me. I work in an office of people wanting to love and serve God and God’s people. I see the joy in the lives of these people who have chosen to serve missionaries so that they can bring eternal joy to others. But as Asian Americans, we know the value of community. We strive to grow and embody the love of Christ, to others, and are employed to live and assist missionaries to bring the life- changing love of Jesus to the world everyday. Even though we are entirely different in our Myers-Briggs, Enneagram types, spiritual gifts, talents and education, by whatever measures you try to box us in, our office staff brings their strengths to work to fulfill God’s purposes daily. The best of times are when we seize the moment and allow God to help us do our best.

But what brightens my day more than anything else is to work with an executive director who has a wonderful laugh that fills his office as he is encouraging a missionary on the phone. Even more is that when he and my boss have a light moment, their unique laughter is such that lightens any moment and fills the entire office with a freedom, a hope and a lightness to take away human seriousness. My office mates still gather for communal lunch and it is in those times of sharing what we do and how we do it that we seize the “fun” in the life around us. By taking moments to laugh, the afternoons move quicker and the days end with joy.

But do I participate? Often no; sadly, I usually choose to be stuck in some accounting realm trying to finish before the next meeting block. I can now see how O’Donohue would admonish me if he could — that I rob myself of community and the freedom to be spontaneous.

Oprah Winfrey notes that “when we laugh together we are one.” She has a wonderful laugh that she employs to disarm those she is interviewing or encouraging. I have seen it many a time as I have watched her shows.

I recently heard an interview by Oprah Winfrey of one of television’s funniest men, Norman Lear. I wonder if anyone has written an academic paper about the spirituality of a belly laugh. Lear, in this short clip, talks about the spiritual moment when an audience that is gathering together in laughter experiences joy, gratitude and enjoyment, and how one’s entire physical body is involved in that laugh for each person. Oprah responded to him that to laugh is “both an offering and praise both to the audience, and the universe.”

I do treasure sharing a good laugh — the kind where tears fall or snorting is heard from laughing so hard. I need to pray for someone to bring that spontaneity in the dark moments. I need to seek the treasure of a child’s giggly coo-ing or a cute dog barking. Perhaps then I might have less darkness in life’s harsh realities. I hope to participate more in the lives of my co-workers who bring me hope. They do what I cannot do for myself because laughter is not something we can do for ourselves. That is why we need soul friends, those who know us best and can draw us into a place that lightens the moment and draws us back to the One who can restore the hope in us. And to allow ourselves to laugh, spontaneously.

Psalms 126:2-3 reads, “When the Lord brought back the captives to Zion we were like men who dreamed. Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy. Then it was said among the nations “The Lord has done great things for them.” The Lord continues to do great things for us, and is the author of spontaneous joy.

Rev. Melanie Mar Chow serves God through Asian American Christian Fellowship, the campus ministry division of the Japanese Evangelical Missionary Society (JEMS). She has been an ordained American Baptist minister since 2004. A Pacific Northwest native, she currently lives with her husband and daughter in Southern California.