Photo by Caleb Roenigk

By Jerrica KF Ching

I believe that it goes without saying that many of us are experiencing anger, and have been processing our feelings towards the current state of the world in the midst of this global pandemic. As a mental health professional, I am finding it hard at times to manage my own emotions, as it is very difficult to feel that I am being effective for clients via telehealth services versus face-to-face interaction. Anxiety has been increasing regarding what the “new normal” will look like for the world, and alongside anxiety comes anger. Anger that the world will not be the same as it had been at the beginning of 2020, and anger that there is not much we have in our control.

Something that I have been reiterating with clients, which has also resonated with me, is the importance of acknowledging anger, as a way for us to move past it. So often anger is looked at as a “bad” or negative emotion. I can definitely recall times where I have engaged in my own self-talk of “Don’t get angry about this!” However the more we suppress anger, the more it will continue to build, ultimately manifesting in either verbal lashing out at others, somatic concerns such as headaches or stomachaches, or even a numbing of all other emotions. Additionally, anger is considered a secondary emotion, so it is important to determine what is underneath this anger. During this day and age of COVID-19, I think the root of anger in many of us is fear and uncertainty of what lies ahead. It feels better to be angry because we can direct this emotion at someone or something. It does not feel good to feel scared, as sometimes we don’t even know what we’re scared of.

After we acknowledge our anger, we can move towards accepting it. It’s important to realize that anger is an appropriate and very normal part of the human experience. Just as positive emotions such as happiness, joy, and excitement can be fleeting, so too can anger, after we accept that this is how we’re feeling in the moment. Acceptance of anger can look very different in us, however for me it is engaging myself in more self-talk of “I’m feeling angry, and I know that’s okay.” Give yourself permission to be angry – your feelings are completely valid! What many of us knew yesterday is not the same as what we know today. The plans that so many of us made during the beginning of 2020 are long gone, or have needed to go under many revisions and adjustments. Without this acceptance piece however, our anger will build, and build, and build, and with nowhere to go you would most undoubtedly head towards some type of internal turmoil or implosion. It’s important to note though that even if you end up in this situation, acknowledge that as well! Acknowledge that you are a human, full of complex ever-changing emotions, and even though last week was manageable, this week may be more chaotic.

Psalm 37:8 reminds us that giving in to worry or anger will often lead to trouble. Some of us may think that this instructs us to rid ourselves of ever experiencing worry and anger. However, I believe it is a gentle reminder that brooding or stewing with worry or anger will lead to trouble, but having the emotion itself will not. May we all take time this month, and in the months to come, to remember to acknowledge and accept our anger in hopes of reaching a new sense of peace and hope.

Jerrica KF Ching grew up on the island of Oahu, Hawaii and currently lives in the beautiful state of Washington, working as a licensed mental health counselor and Asian/Pacific Islander mental health specialist at Columbia Wellness. She graduated with an MA in Marriage, Couple, and Family Counseling from George Fox University, where she is now an adjunct professor and supervisor. She finds joy in sharing her compassion with students on the importance of recognizing and acknowledging racial and cultural differences in others. Her research on racial colorblindness has been published in The International Journal of Social Science Studies.